Would you rather?

[Anthropophagus]

I fucking love this game and play it often, although usually with gross/gay examples. I'll begin with a relatively benign one.

Would you rather:

-Be severely autistic with a high paying job that makes use of your Rain Man talents and rewards them handsomely, but be condemned to a life of never truly understanding human connection, romance, etc. You have wealth but die alone and cold, not even able to make eye contact with the hospice nurse who holds your hand in comfort as you pass away.

Or

-Popular and social, with many friends and girlfriends, but also an absolute moron with a shit tier job, living in a trailer in the Deep South. You die at like age 62 because you're simple white trash who eats bad, drinks a lot, and just shitty genes, but you had a fun ride.

Or

-Black, with no prospects, living in an inner city ghetto, but you have a huge penis and own at least 50 pairs of super skinny jeans which endow you with considerable clout. No certain death date, but there are shootings where you live so your odds of dying are significant, plus bad diet/genes as well. This is a gambling man's choice.

[Dungeon Snake]

Obviously the superior choice is the redneck trailer guy

[Kane]

3rd.. That way I can commit violent crimes, die whilst high on drugs with a cop on my back and be praised like jesus at my funeral. Jobless and entitled Che Guevara lovers will riot in the streets and burn down small businesses in my name.

[Anthropophagus]

I'll get another one going in the meanwhile:

-You're a werewolf. You get to bite and claw people up. Your hide is thick and somewhat impervious to conventional weapons. You're fast as fuck and can leap great distances. You get to fuck furry bitches doggy style. You wake up naked in a field a lot and can never work a third shift job. Half your life is a normal human life but you have to buy clothes a lot because they get ruined when you transform. Oh and when you're the werewolf, you have fleas, so you're itchy a lot.

-You're a vampire. You get a neat villa to live in. You're suave and can charm women (and men; your choice, I guess) so lots of sex before you kill them for blood. You can fly, I think. If you don't kill someone, you can make them a mindless slave. Susceptible to sunlight and stakes, unfortunately, but the good news is you CAN have a third shift job. You also have to talk in that stupid fucking stereotypical vampire/Count voice.

-You're a Frankenstein. You're the strongest of the monsters. You don't even need to worry about getting sex because you can rape everyone. You have to share a castle with a mad scientist as a roommate but he's there all the time so you never get lonely. You're dumb as fuck though and can't communicate well. This should come easily to some of the autists on the forum. No job because you're too goddamn stupid to have a job. Okay, maybe construction. You also have a temper and break shit and beat/kill people when anatagonized so no going out for the most part.

[Kane]

Vampire, easy choice

[Dungeon Snake]

yeah vampire certainly seems like the best out of those

Here's one:

Would you rather fuck a chick who is a centaur (so you have to fuck a horse pussy but her upper half is hot) or a chick who is a minotaur (lower body of a hot girl but face/shoulders of a cow). also in this scenario, with the minotaur chick she will be riding you and mooing like a cow, dripping cow slobber on you.

[Kane]

Centaur. Any hole's a goal, right?

[Anthropophagus]

Centaur. Guys who stare at a pussy while they're fucking it are weird versus a female's body.

[Anthropophagus]

I should have just made the vampire gay for balance. And you constantly run the risk of drinking HIV blood and getting vampire AIDS.

[Old Rivers]

Popular Redneck for the first one; werewolf for the second.

[Shaun]

Would you rather...

Bite the head off a gopher --or-- thoroughly lick a cat's ass?
Be the greatest at one particular thing --or-- good but not great at lots of things?
Not lose your virginity until age 40 --or-- never have an orgasm?
Eat six guitar strings --or-- shit a softball?
Always look great in photographs but bad in person --or-- vice versa?

[Anthropophagus]

Originally Posted by Shaun

Would you rather...

Bite the head off a gopher --or-- thoroughly lick a cat's ass?
Be the greatest at one particular thing --or-- good but not great at lots of things?
Wait til age 40 to lose your virginity --or-- never have an orgasm?
Eat six guitar strings --or-- shit a softball?
Always look great in photographs but bad in person --or-- vice versa?

-Bite the gopher's head. I'd just not eat for a week so it would be out of hungry desperation and more palatable.
-Too vague, those terms. Also, do I have a choice at what I'm great/good at? Because, if so, I'd choose great in a profitable area and become rich.
-I almost want to say never having an orgasm because the pleasure for me is in the doing, plus by age 40 you're on borrowed time before you potentially lose your sex drive and/or get ED problems. Hard choice.
-I don't know which one is medically safer but I'd choose that one.
-Obviously great in real life. Who wants to be a permanent cat fish?

[Dungeon Snake]

Originally Posted by Shaun

Bite the head off a gopher --or-- thoroughly lick a cat's ass?

gopher

Be the greatest at one particular thing --or-- good but not great at lots of things?

Idk sapone's right, this is too vague. I guess good at lots of things? Since that's more how I am irl. Here's a better question:
Live a short but awesome life and die suddenly at age 27, OR live until age 90 but never do anything particularly interesting

Not lose your virginity until age 40 --or-- never have an orgasm?

This one doesn't make any sense? If you can't have an orgasm then you might as well never lose your virginity at all? This question is basically like, "Would you rather never have an orgasm, or never have an orgasm with a woman until age 40?" Obviously i'm going to choose age 40???

Eat six guitar strings --or-- shit a softball?

Either way you are going to end up in the hospital and probably need surgery. So I'll pick the guitar strings, at least that way my butthole isn't blown out forever and hopefully I won't end up shitting in a colostomy bag.

Always look great in photographs but bad in person --or-- vice versa?

I already have vice-versa so I'll go with that.

[Anthropophagus]

Would you rather be gay (and a bottom) but in the happiest, most fulfilling relationship you could ever hope for, or straight with an attractive wife but she's dead behind the eyes and you feel little connection? In the latter, you're permanently married and if you separate or divorce or otherwise cease being a couple then a bunch of guys who look like Boris (Middle Eastern) stone you to death.

[Nixon]

oh man, i’d definitely have to pick the softball over the guitar strings, cant imagine all the scratching and ripping an entire set of strings with their different coilings would do, the tips of the thin higher note strings would be straight up popping your inner walls and guts, whereas if its a softball you can at least prepare your hole with a dildo and some lube first

[Anthropophagus]

Also, the softball scenario requires clarification: do you shit the softball right from your rectum, or does it travel your colon? Because if it's anything but the first one, you'd die painfully.

[Dungeon Snake]

Originally Posted by Nixon

oh man, i’d definitely have to pick the softball over the guitar strings, cant imagine all the scratching and ripping an entire set of strings with their different coilings would do, the tips of the thin higher note strings would be straight up popping your inner walls and guts, whereas if its a softball you can at least prepare your hole with a dildo and some lube first

ehhhh i dont think itd be that bad. you just have to gingerly force them down your throat in such a way that they curl up inside your stomach. then you go to the hospital to have them surgically removed.

Softball, a dildo wouldn't be good enough to practice. it would be like passing a baby. there would be all kinds of ripping and tearing of tissue, blood everywhere

[Dungeon Snake]

Originally Posted by Anthropophagus

Would you rather be gay (and a bottom) but in the happiest, most fulfilling relationship you could ever hope for, or straight with an attractive wife but she's dead behind the eyes and you feel little connection? In the latter, you're permanently married and if you separate or divorce or otherwise cease being a couple then a bunch of guys who look like Boris (Middle Eastern) stone you to death.

I think being gay is probably better than having any kind of straight marriage, tbh. Gay guys have it easy, especially gay bottoms. imagine never having to listen to a woman complain, ever again in your life. what can you even threaten a gay bottom with? "Oh you mean you'll send me to prison, where hot guys will pound my ass? "

[Shaun]

Originally Posted by Anthropophagus

Also, the softball scenario requires clarification: do you shit the softball right from your rectum, or does it travel your colon? Because if it's anything but the first one, you'd die painfully.

Just think about your choice as isolated events, and not how they would affect your insides later on... assume you're physically A-OK after. You pass a softball without eating it or eat guitar strings you don't have to pass. Which experience would suck less?

Originally Posted by Dungeon Snake

This one doesn't make any sense? If you can't have an orgasm then you might as well never lose your virginity at all? This question is basically like, "Would you rather never have an orgasm, or never have an orgasm with a woman until age 40?" Obviously i'm going to choose age 40???

You still penetrate and fuck and experience intimacy; you just can't cum. If the orgasm is all that's important then I guess it's just an easy question for you

Originally Posted by Anthropophagus

-Too vague, those terms. Also, do I have a choice at what I'm great/good at? Because, if so, I'd choose great in a profitable area and become rich.

yeah I should've said you can choose what your great talent is. Lots of potential here, but being generally useful to a lot of people practically guarantees a rich fulfilling life in my view





Also:
fucking a centaur over a minotaur has got to be the easiest choice ever. I mean the question might as well be, "would you rather fuck a fish-head creature or just get blown by the Disney princess"

[Dungeon Snake]

Originally Posted by Shaun

You still penetrate and fuck and experience intimacy; you just can't cum. If the orgasm is all that's important then I guess it's just an easy question for you

....



....



.........so you just jiggle your dick around inside a pussy and its impossible to ever cum? No thanks.

Also:
fucking a centaur over a minotaur has got to be the easiest choice ever. I mean the question might as well be, "would you rather fuck a fish-head creature or just get blown by the Disney princess"

You're not allowed to just get a blowjob from the centaur. You have to actually fuck the horse pussy. In both cases, you have to fuck the pussy to completion and bust inside (no condom). With the horse girl, you'll most likely to have stand on top of a stool or something to reach her horse-pussy. The actual hot female torso will be 5 feet away or so, where a horse's head and shoulders would normally be.

[Dungeon Snake]

Originally Posted by Shaun

Just think about your choice as isolated events, and not how they would affect your insides later on... assume you're physically A-OK after. You pass a softball without eating it or eat guitar strings you don't have to pass. Which experience would suck less?"

this case i would definitely prefer the guitar strings. No butthole torture for me, thank you. throat torture would be easier for me

[Dungeon Snake]

Originally Posted by Anthropophagus

Centaur. Guys who stare at a pussy while they're fucking it are weird versus a female's body.

I don't stare at the pussy at all, but I would still go with the minotaur. Centaur, you might not be staring at the pussy, but you would know you were fucking a horse's pussy. It would feel completely different from a human pussy. To me, that seems way more like bestiality cuz you're actually fucking the animal part. If I was fucking the minotaur girl, i could still at least look at her tits, it wouldn't really be that different from fucking a horny, stupid girl with an ugly face but a nice body.

[Nixon]

Originally Posted by Dungeon Snake

a dildo wouldn't be good enough to practice. it would be like passing a baby. there would be all kinds of ripping and tearing of tissue, blood everywhere

what if you were given a length of time to train your ass hole and stretch it out gradually like them crazy ladies with the basketballs, on that note, i wonder why it isn’t common practice for pregnant women to stretch their vaginas before giving birth

[Anthropophagus]

Originally Posted by Dungeon Snake

I think being gay is probably better than having any kind of straight marriage, tbh. Gay guys have it easy, especially gay bottoms. imagine never having to listen to a woman complain, ever again in your life. what can you even threaten a gay bottom with? "Oh you mean you'll send me to prison, where hot guys will pound my ass? "

I have different thoughts for a general discussion about gay relationships versus my scenario. I don't think what you said about never hearing a woman complain again is true at all but it also depends on the "type" of gay guy in the relationship. Flamboyant/girly gay dudes are as bad as women. You'd be exchanging one problem for the same one with different genitals. Maybe a manly "buddy" partner would be better but my guess is that you'd exchange weak feminine complaining for masculine arguing and competition which would get old too. You're leaving out the whole dimension of having to get fucked in the ass regularly which, for me at least, is not a great prospect and one of the worst parts of that deal. Even being a top would be horrible, although marginally better. The best it could get for me is a submissive trap who passes, because he's physically the closest to a woman.

This is all moot for my example though because it's stated that the relationship is fulfilling and you're happy. Happy to get fucked up the ass. Forever.

[Anthropophagus]

Originally Posted by Dungeon Snake

this case i would definitely prefer the guitar strings. No butthole torture for me, thank you. throat torture would be easier for me

Yeah, that really removes the danger and I like it being about which is more physically damaging. As a dago, I'd make short work of slurping down noodle like objects if there's no medical consequence.