Storytime: Christo vs Red

Jesterfoot · 11:18 PM

As Christo walked down the narrow alleyway along the cobblestone street, he could tell he was getting closer to his destination. The architecture was noticably less polished here, many houses missing bricks, seemingly unmaintained for hundreds of years. He realized he'd have to adapt his fighting style that heavily relied on vast forests, and utilization of natural objects. In fact, the town seemed like another world entirely and he was sure he stood out as everyone who passed by gave him menacing glance. Through their eyes he could see many of the people here had broken souls, moraly twisted, compensated by an air of blind pride. It was a bit unsettling. He reached into his pocket and took a pill, just in case. When he looked up, He noticed a tall, pale man with a plaid hat and a gold chain spraying crude words on a nearby wall. The man quickly turned around and looked christo dead in the eyes.

"Wut the fok you lookin at fuckface?"

"I think 'e fancy's you mate" said another walking out of the shadows.

"Just passing through" said Christo calmy looking away

It was easy to distinguish his thick Virginia accent and their eyes became more menacing as they began to circle around him.

"ehh Duncan, looks like we've got a yank on ah hands"

Christo, who had never been called a yank, shrugged and frantically thought of a way out of this situation. His heart began to beat faster, his palms became sweaty, and he struggled to breathe normally. He did his best to appear calm.

"an jus' wut tha fook you doin 'ere on ma block" oneof the chavs said as they walked closer.

"I.....I....I'm......looking for Red Scorpion." said christo trying to speak through his tightening throat.

The two guys burst into laughter, "hahahahahahaha....Red Scorpion?....ahahahahahaha.."
and just as quickly as they burst into laughter, their beady eyes had become even more deadly. Duncan, walked closer to Christo until his chin was mere inches from Christo's forehead.

"...an wut do tha fook ya want with Red eh?" Whispered Duncan in a Serpent-like tone. He was so close, Christo could smell the whiskey in his breath, and saw Duncans hand reach into his pocket.
Christo, already gripping his own pocketknife, wasn't here to fight them but he was definitely prepared to. He focused intently on the memories that brought him the most peace: The scent of old Virginia pines in spring, and the feeling of coming back home to his cabin with big steak after a longs day out in the field. This seemed to have worked.

He opened his eyes and stared back, now just as menacing and cold as theirs, but with the added flame of a true southern-born.
Without missing a beat and ready for any outcome he said:

"I'm here to kill him."

The two Chavs looked at each other quite confused at the bold confession this odd american has just given them... Duncan's eyes softened and couldn't resist but smirk in amusement and anticipation. After a few moments the bloke from the shadows spoke up.

"eh...well alright. follow us."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

edit: solo project

John Coffee · 08-17-2015, 02:04 PM

i think you should just continue it yourself. pretty good so far

Dungeon Snake · 08-17-2015, 04:11 PM

yeah. not accurate in some ways but pretty entertaining nonetheless

Trooper · 08-17-2015, 06:15 PM

As a Brit I don't understand how to do British stereotypes effectively.

Tony Clay · 08-17-2015, 06:19 PM

I feel compelled to make a dramatized audio edition of Jesterfoot's story

Tony Clay · 08-17-2015, 06:37 PM

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1IMu59iAmBK

enjoy

i did a completely improvisational cold read so it would sound more genuine

the times in the story reading where i fuck up and retry a line are unedited

and yes sorry for the sound's low quality

i dont own a real mic

Broken Pencil · 08-17-2015, 10:23 PM

Wow, that was actually really good reading that with Tony's voice.
I'm honestly surprised you're not a professional voice actor.

Jesterfoot · 08-17-2015, 11:17 PM

lol not bad tony, though you gave christo a californian accent, and the scottish dudes a new yorker accent.

I'll add to this in a bit

French Fry · 08-18-2015, 04:02 AM

I wrote a huge 3 paragraphs detailing how Christo went and found Red who was apparently murdered by Goat, but I lost track of time and it signed me out.

Nixon · 08-18-2015, 11:34 AM

that's probably for the best

Roadkill Dave · 08-18-2015, 05:30 PM

jesus wept.

Bobby Swisha · 02:40 AM

I am a worthless human being

Dungeon Snake · 08-22-2015, 01:15 AM

somebody post some more shit already. jeez louise. jesterfoot just go. or let me go. somebody GO

Jesterfoot · 08-22-2015, 02:49 AM

I was gonna start the next segment from Red Scorpion's perspective as an outcast, sympathetic of his insecurities. But he went off the rails again, and it seems now that a complete and utter mockery is more appropriate.

I don't have motivation right now, and I'm not sure I hate him enough to do it justice, but whoever wants to do it can go for it

Old Rivers · 08-22-2015, 03:48 AM

i'll do one tonight, after i've had a few.

Dungeon Snake · 08-25-2015, 08:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Old Rivers at 08-21-2015, 22:48 EST

i'll do one tonight, after i've had a few.

you lyin' son of a bitch

Bobby Swisha · 08-25-2015, 10:27 PM

The two Chavs led Christo down a series of dark alleyways. They became unusually quiet, and as they got closer to their destination, Christo could feel the tension building. His spirit was ready to destroy Red Scorpion, and nothing could stop him.

Suddenly, as Christo was lost in thought, they have reached a backyard parallel to a canal and stopped near an old, seemingly abandoned house.

"So this is where he is, eh? Doesn't look like much." said Christo.

A deep voice from beyond the shadows answered him in return. "Unfortunately....No."

Out stepped a man. 6'4", of strong physical build, with dark complexion and dark eyes, he was completely nude.

He took a few steps closer, with his penis and testicles hanging there in plain sight, and looked Christo up and down.

One of the chavs smirked.

"If you want to find Red Scorpion...You're going to have to go through Jesterfoot first."

Eukos · 08-25-2015, 10:36 PM

Jesterfoot · 08-25-2015, 10:54 PM

lol I'm only 6'2

I'll leave it up to the next writer to decide where they want to continue from

Old Rivers · 08-25-2015, 11:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dungeon Snake

you lyin' son of a bitch

i had a few too many

Dungeon Snake · 08-26-2015, 12:10 AM

after dispatching the African-American gladiator, Christo stalked down the darkened Scottish byways and sluice-gullies towards his god-damn foe.
the pills he took (plus the booze he'd chugged earlier) made him a force of unstoppable lethality as he pushed idiotic Chavs aside.
None of them understood the power of somebody who faces death daily.
Christo found Red Scorpion and pulled him off his knees.
"You fucking suck," Christo snarled. "You are a bad poster. Stop posting on 3dmm.com or I will gut you like fish."
He idly fondled his kabar.

red scorpion pissed his pants and shat himself. Christo left him there, a sobbing wreck, and flew back to america.

THE END....?

Old Rivers · 08-26-2015, 12:12 AM

hey you can't participate!!

Dungeon Snake · 08-26-2015, 12:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Old Rivers

hey you can't participate!!

stop me

Phil Williamson · 08-26-2015, 12:19 AM

THEN CHRISTO WOKE UP. He groggily surveyed his surroundings through a splitting headache. Then it all came back to him...the chavs...the alleyway...the mocking arse-beating he had received when he dared to bring up his intention to fight the most feared man in Dundee. Everything since that had been a dream...he was lying in a pile of garbage, stewing in his own excrement, naked, with TEA-CHUCKING TWAT crudely scrawled across his chest.

Christo couldn't help himself. He started openly sobbing. A young girl, walking down the alley, saw him and laughed, then flicked her cigarette butt onto his naked body. "Ow that hurt!!!!" cried Christo, redoubling his sobs.

Slowly he began to regain control of himself. "You can do this," he said through clenched teeth, "you can still get this guy!"

Eukos · 08-26-2015, 12:27 AM

So like the fearsome warrior that he once dreamed to be, he took some dirt off the ground and threw it into Jesterfoot's face

!!!!! WHAAAEEEARR !!!!!!

It was over. Fatal hit.

"I surrender, I will gladly suck your dick now - Master Christo"

"I'll get back to you... in hell."

08-14-2015, 02:14 AM	#1
Jesterfoot Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 7,470	Storytime: Christo vs Red As Christo walked down the narrow alleyway along the cobblestone street, he could tell he was getting closer to his destination. The architecture was noticably less polished here, many houses missing bricks, seemingly unmaintained for hundreds of years. He realized he'd have to adapt his fighting style that heavily relied on vast forests, and utilization of natural objects. In fact, the town seemed like another world entirely and he was sure he stood out as everyone who passed by gave him menacing glance. Through their eyes he could see many of the people here had broken souls, moraly twisted, compensated by an air of blind pride. It was a bit unsettling. He reached into his pocket and took a pill, just in case. When he looked up, He noticed a tall, pale man with a plaid hat and a gold chain spraying crude words on a nearby wall. The man quickly turned around and looked christo dead in the eyes. "Wut the fok you lookin at fuckface?" "I think 'e fancy's you mate" said another walking out of the shadows. "Just passing through" said Christo calmy looking away It was easy to distinguish his thick Virginia accent and their eyes became more menacing as they began to circle around him. "ehh Duncan, looks like we've got a yank on ah hands" Christo, who had never been called a yank, shrugged and frantically thought of a way out of this situation. His heart began to beat faster, his palms became sweaty, and he struggled to breathe normally. He did his best to appear calm. "an jus' wut tha fook you doin 'ere on ma block" oneof the chavs said as they walked closer. "I.....I....I'm......looking for Red Scorpion." said christo trying to speak through his tightening throat. The two guys burst into laughter, "hahahahahahaha....Red Scorpion?....ahahahahahaha.." and just as quickly as they burst into laughter, their beady eyes had become even more deadly. Duncan, walked closer to Christo until his chin was mere inches from Christo's forehead. "...an wut do tha fook ya want with Red eh?" Whispered Duncan in a Serpent-like tone. He was so close, Christo could smell the whiskey in his breath, and saw Duncans hand reach into his pocket. Christo, already gripping his own pocketknife, wasn't here to fight them but he was definitely prepared to. He focused intently on the memories that brought him the most peace: The scent of old Virginia pines in spring, and the feeling of coming back home to his cabin with big steak after a longs day out in the field. This seemed to have worked. He opened his eyes and stared back, now just as menacing and cold as theirs, but with the added flame of a true southern-born. Without missing a beat and ready for any outcome he said: "I'm here to kill him." The two Chavs looked at each other quite confused at the bold confession this odd american has just given them... Duncan's eyes softened and couldn't resist but smirk in amusement and anticipation. After a few moments the bloke from the shadows spoke up. "eh...well alright. follow us." -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- edit: solo project
	Last edited by Jesterfoot : 08-17-2015 at 11:18 PM.

08-17-2015, 06:15 PM	#4
Trooper Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 7,441	As a Brit I don't understand how to do British stereotypes effectively.
Trooper Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 7,441

08-17-2015, 06:19 PM	#5
Tony Clay Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 2,583	I feel compelled to make a dramatized audio edition of Jesterfoot's story
Tony Clay Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 2,583

08-17-2015, 06:37 PM	#6
Tony Clay Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 2,583	http://vocaroo.com/i/s1IMu59iAmBK enjoy i did a completely improvisational cold read so it would sound more genuine the times in the story reading where i fuck up and retry a line are unedited and yes sorry for the sound's low quality i dont own a real mic
Tony Clay Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 2,583

08-18-2015, 11:34 AM	#10
Nixon Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 4,293	that's probably for the best
Nixon Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 4,293

08-17-2015, 02:04 PM	#2
John Coffee Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 1,595	i think you should just continue it yourself. pretty good so far

08-17-2015, 04:11 PM	#3
Dungeon Snake Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 17,519	yeah. not accurate in some ways but pretty entertaining nonetheless

08-17-2015, 10:23 PM	#7
Broken Pencil Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2013 Posts: 2,341	Wow, that was actually really good reading that with Tony's voice. I'm honestly surprised you're not a professional voice actor.

08-17-2015, 11:17 PM	#8
Jesterfoot Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 7,470	lol not bad tony, though you gave christo a californian accent, and the scottish dudes a new yorker accent. I'll add to this in a bit

08-18-2015, 04:02 AM	#9
French Fry Super Moderator Join Date: Dec 2013 Posts: 1,962	I wrote a huge 3 paragraphs detailing how Christo went and found Red who was apparently murdered by Goat, but I lost track of time and it signed me out.

08-18-2015, 05:30 PM	#11
Roadkill Dave Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 2,458	jesus wept.

08-18-2015, 06:18 PM	#12
Bobby Swisha Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2002 Posts: 46,012	I am a worthless human being
	Last edited by Jesterfoot : 08-19-2015 at 02:40 AM.

08-22-2015, 01:15 AM	#13
Dungeon Snake Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 17,519	somebody post some more shit already. jeez louise. jesterfoot just go. or let me go. somebody GO

08-22-2015, 02:49 AM	#14
Jesterfoot Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 7,470	I was gonna start the next segment from Red Scorpion's perspective as an outcast, sympathetic of his insecurities. But he went off the rails again, and it seems now that a complete and utter mockery is more appropriate. I don't have motivation right now, and I'm not sure I hate him enough to do it justice, but whoever wants to do it can go for it

08-22-2015, 03:48 AM	#15
Old Rivers Super Moderator Join Date: May 2009 Posts: 6,985	i'll do one tonight, after i've had a few.

08-25-2015, 10:27 PM	#17
Bobby Swisha Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2002 Posts: 46,012	The two Chavs led Christo down a series of dark alleyways. They became unusually quiet, and as they got closer to their destination, Christo could feel the tension building. His spirit was ready to destroy Red Scorpion, and nothing could stop him. Suddenly, as Christo was lost in thought, they have reached a backyard parallel to a canal and stopped near an old, seemingly abandoned house. "So this is where he is, eh? Doesn't look like much." said Christo. A deep voice from beyond the shadows answered him in return. "Unfortunately....No." Out stepped a man. 6'4", of strong physical build, with dark complexion and dark eyes, he was completely nude. He took a few steps closer, with his penis and testicles hanging there in plain sight, and looked Christo up and down. One of the chavs smirked. "If you want to find Red Scorpion...You're going to have to go through Jesterfoot first."

08-25-2015, 10:36 PM	#18
Eukos Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 3,133
Eukos Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 3,133

08-25-2015, 10:54 PM	#19
Jesterfoot Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 7,470	lol I'm only 6'2 I'll leave it up to the next writer to decide where they want to continue from

08-26-2015, 12:10 AM	#21
Dungeon Snake Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 17,519	after dispatching the African-American gladiator, Christo stalked down the darkened Scottish byways and sluice-gullies towards his god-damn foe. the pills he took (plus the booze he'd chugged earlier) made him a force of unstoppable lethality as he pushed idiotic Chavs aside. None of them understood the power of somebody who faces death daily. Christo found Red Scorpion and pulled him off his knees. "You fucking suck," Christo snarled. "You are a bad poster. Stop posting on 3dmm.com or I will gut you like fish." He idly fondled his kabar. red scorpion pissed his pants and shat himself. Christo left him there, a sobbing wreck, and flew back to america. THE END....?

08-26-2015, 12:12 AM	#22
Old Rivers Super Moderator Join Date: May 2009 Posts: 6,985	hey you can't participate!!

08-26-2015, 12:19 AM	#24
Phil Williamson Super Moderator Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 16,900	THEN CHRISTO WOKE UP. He groggily surveyed his surroundings through a splitting headache. Then it all came back to him...the chavs...the alleyway...the mocking arse-beating he had received when he dared to bring up his intention to fight the most feared man in Dundee. Everything since that had been a dream...he was lying in a pile of garbage, stewing in his own excrement, naked, with TEA-CHUCKING TWAT crudely scrawled across his chest. Christo couldn't help himself. He started openly sobbing. A young girl, walking down the alley, saw him and laughed, then flicked her cigarette butt onto his naked body. "Ow that hurt!!!!" cried Christo, redoubling his sobs. Slowly he began to regain control of himself. "You can do this," he said through clenched teeth, "you can still get this guy!"

08-26-2015, 12:27 AM	#25
Eukos Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 3,133	So like the fearsome warrior that he once dreamed to be, he took some dirt off the ground and threw it into Jesterfoot's face !!!!! WHAAAEEEARR !!!!!! It was over. Fatal hit. "I surrender, I will gladly suck your dick now - Master Christo" "I'll get back to you... in hell."
Eukos Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 3,133