Share you horrible room/house mate stories!

[Jimmah]

For the past 2 years, me and wife have not lived on our own, but shared with others. This time next month we will finally be alone, and ready to finally laying down some groundwork for a family.

As we were getting married, and then moving to Barcelona we had to save, and since living here we've not been able to. In the meantime we've lived with some people and FUCK ME, it's amazing how hideous people are.

One was a friend I've known since I was six, and I grew up with her and we were best mates. Me, wife, her and her fella all lived together when we first moved to Spain. Since living with her, I realise she has a chronic weed problem. Before I thought she just LIKED weed. But one night she lost her weed and started CRYING, saying she 'needed' it.

Her boyfriend woke her up most mornings as he went to work, and we could hear her crying cus he had woke her. As in, actually crying/wailing. It was the most pathetic thing I'd heard from a 26 year old woman.

I went in their room and there was a used condom on their dresser once.

Most days they would have upwards of 20 empty beer cans in their room. With stacks of plates, mouldy cups and most empty cans used as cigarette trays.

She was hideously sick once, and threw up in the bath as it was closer than the toilet. She left the sick, and went back to bed. She left it for the whole afternoon (fella didnt clean it for her), and my wife cleaned it up (i was at work) and then my wife became sick because of it.

We had cockroaches at one point (very common in Barcelona, it seems, unfortunately), and we did everything to get rid of them. She left half an eaten pizza out on a plate in the kitchen for 2 days. I finally asked her what she wanted to do (ie. throw up, put it in the fridge, staple it to your wall) and she asked if it was a problem being in the kitchen. On a fucking plate. As in, do I need to spell it out?

There's more. But I'll let you share some.

I'm actually expecting half of you to be filthy people, siding with my disgusting friends.

[Lord Blazer]

I've lived with 3 sets of people. (excluding my parents, of course.)

The first was my girlfriend, who I'd been dating for two years. Decide to move in together, turns out she actually is a horrible person and awfully mean and it's not just the long-distance thing that is causing problems. Not really too much of a story there. I had mentally decided to break up with her in say... january, but had nowhere else to go (this is at school) so I just had to suck it up for another 4 months until the semester was over.

Moved in with a friend from high school for two years, that was pretty great all around but it was expensive as hell and I kind of regret it for that reason. (700/month, when I'm only working every other 4 months, eugh)

Now, the folks I live with now.

I graduate in December, and since this is a college town, 99% of leases run August-august, full year only. Managed to find a dude on Something Awful that needed a roommate. $300 a month, everything included. Don't have to pay for on-street parking in this neighborhood, so like, this is pretty solid.

I come check out the place. It's uhhhh messy but I figure I invest a little bit of time and clean it up and then I'll have a nice place, living with these 4 other people. This is late June, I move in the first week of august.

It comes time to move in. I drag some of my less-important stuff over. Winter coats and extra computer cables and books and stuff. The dude that had my room uhh he still has his bed and a dresser in my room. And a girl that moved out in April has all of her bedroom furniture and shit sitting in the living room (that nobody uses but... come on, now)

And... the place has gotten a lot messier since I toured it. The one windowsill in my room is covered in a combination of mouse shit, dead bugs, candle wax, and incense ash. The tub in the bathroom on my floor has this thick, greasy, black film all over it. And the one window in my room is uhhh coming out of the wall. Like, enough water damage has happened to the wall such that the window frame does not have anything to hold onto and is just... falling out.

So I have a bit of a panic attack about this place that I'm going to be living in for a few months.

I get my roommate and girlfriend to come over and help me clean and bleach everything and uh well, I guess things are okay. I put some of those sonic mouse-repellers in my room eventually, after mice come in and eat on all my food one night, I make sure to keep my room and my bathroom neat, and the kitchen uh

The kitchen. So... the fridge is full, but my old roommate gave me her minifridge, so I can at least keep milk and some stuff in my own room. The fridge is full of very old, moldy food. There is a jar of spaghetti sauce, one quarter full, sitting out where the sun hits the kitchen, and about 1/3 of the jar is pure mold. The backsplash behind the sink at one point had some tomatoes sitting on it. These have become a black, unrecognizable sludge. I decide that I am not going to use the kitchen in this place.

In addition, when I picked up my keys I told the main roommate that I had a job as a software developer. He has been to and dropped out of college several times on a computer science degree. One of my first nights over, he asks me if I can give his resume to my boss. I say sure, say goodbye, and leave. I look at his resume. It's... not a resume. It is a list of the past 8 jobs he has had. All of these jobs are like... LINE COOK AT QDOBA (MAY-JUNE 2012) and shit like that, and then he has all three times he dropped out of school and his high school on there, and that's it. That's literally... it's not a resume, is what it is. I proceed to hang it up on the bulletin board in my shared cubicle, for all to laugh at.

Things are going okay. I keep my room clean, I keep my bathroom clean, I make a lot of food in my microwave. It's uhhh it's livable.

One day, about a month in, the black film in the tub has returned. I get out the super nasty scouring pad and the bleach, pop in my headphones, and get down to scrubbing. Primary roommate (the one I met on SA) knocks on the door. He's a spergy-ass neckbearded piece of shit.

J(roommate): Hey man uhhh if you want help uh cleaning or anything like, I know this place is uhh kind of a mess but like, I can help, just let me know when you're going to do it, I'm just uhh bad at scheduling

[I pull out my headphones]

Me: J, you're aware that this house has a mouse infestation, right?

J: What?

Me: The dish drainer in the kitchen. Those little black bits. That's mouse shit.

J: uhhhhh

[I pop my headphones back in and go back to scrubbing]

So uhhh yeah. I live with these disgusting fucking awful people. Got a full-time job as a software dev starting in january so I'm looking for a new place now, having trouble finding a decent place with a lease starting in january.

[Dungeon Snake]

i'm pretty sure i am the awful roomate that most people complain about. frankly, i think you lame-assed bitch-punk gimps are the most fucking boring people on earth. you wanna be totally lame? whatever, but quit trying to be the fucking Sheriff of the 5-Room Suite and get all offended when i drink beer every night. the best roomates i ever had was when i lived with a bunch of other "terrible roomates" who got fucked up every night and we would program video games together, take videos of us punching each other in the face, make DIY slip-n-slides out of broken whiskey bottles, play Grindcore shows in the living room, get drunk on jungle juice and watch Party House, etc
there was a used condom in SOMEBODY ELSE'S ROOM? and you're pissed about it? whatever man.

[Lord Blazer]

Originally Posted by Lord Blazer

In addition, when I picked up my keys I told the main roommate that I had a job as a software developer. He has been to and dropped out of college several times on a computer science degree. One of my first nights over, he asks me if I can give his resume to my boss. I say sure, say goodbye, and leave. I look at his resume. It's... not a resume. It is a list of the past 8 jobs he has had. All of these jobs are like... LINE COOK AT QDOBA (MAY-JUNE 2012) and shit like that, and then he has all three times he dropped out of school and his high school on there, and that's it. That's literally... it's not a resume, is what it is. I proceed to hang it up on the bulletin board in my shared cubicle, for all to laugh at.

Here it is after he revised it, and some goon ripping it apart:

[Jimmah]

Originally Posted by Christo

there was a used condom in SOMEBODY ELSE'S ROOM? and you're pissed about it? whatever man.

I'm not pissed off about it, not really. It's just it highlights how fake people are. This condom was on their bedside table, at about 3pm. He was at work. She was in all day after he left. That says to me they had sex, they put a used condom on an area where you keep your phone, or drink, glasses, etc. they left it there for a good portion of the day. If you do that, what else do you do?

These are people that spend ages making sure they are looking smart for work, wearing makeup, tidying their hair, all for appearance. The way they actually live is entirely the opposite. If they weren't working they'd not wash all day, theyd only tidy if people were visiting. It's just all an act.

That's why people like this get sick, and have fucking random illnesses more often, because you catch shit from a dirty living environment. The last time I was ill was January 2011, that from food poisoning in a restaurant in Belgium. Probably cus the person who made my food was a person like my flat mate.

My current flat mate spends hours doing his hair, asking if he looks good, trying to impress women if he goes out but if you saw his mouldy rooms, and realised he doesn't wash his bed sheets (hasn't for 2 months he's been with us) that it's all just a lie. His room smells so bad I ask him to leave the windows open when he's out and use air freshener to try and hide the smell. He's going to leave his room STAINED in a bad smell.

I just object to the fucking fake-ness of it. These people are adults, 26-27 year olds who essentially need someone to tidy up after them. When they are 'clean' it's all outwards appearance.

[Jimmah]

Originally Posted by Lord Blazer

Here it is after he revised it, and some goon ripping it apart:

Haha that's awful man, but the poor guy must have had no help writing CVs before though. Well, I hope not.

[Lord Blazer]

You go google example resume and you will know not to do any of that shit.

[Dungeon Snake]

Originally Posted by Jimmah

I'm not pissed off about it, not really. It's just it highlights how fake people are. This condom was on their bedside table, at about 3pm. He was at work. She was in all day after he left. That says to me they had sex, they put a used condom on an area where you keep your phone, or drink, glasses, etc. they left it there for a good portion of the day. If you do that, what else do you do?

These are people that spend ages making sure they are looking smart for work, wearing makeup, tidying their hair, all for appearance. The way they actually live is entirely the opposite. If they weren't working they'd not wash all day, theyd only tidy if people

My current flat mate spends hours doing his hair, asking if he looks good, trying to impress women if he goes out but if you saw his mouldy rooms, and realised he doesn't wash his bed sheets (hasn't for 2 months he's been with us) that it's all just a lie. His room smells so bad I ask him to leave the windows open when he's out and use air freshener to try and hide the smell. He's going to leave his room STAINED in a bad smell.

I just object to the fucking fake-ness of it. These people are adults, 26-27 year olds who essentially need someone to tidy up after them. When they are 'clean' it's all outwards appearance.

word, I can respect that. sorry I'm asuch n asshole. you sound like Holden Caulfield, tho, ps

[Kevitus]

Luckily, I've never lived with anyone else yet. I already get freaked out when there are occasions when you have to live with other people for a week or something, like on holidays. I mean it's ok with friends, but when you don't really know people I just wouldn't be able to make myself at home. I'm kind of big about privacy.
Anyway when I first moved out, I thought that my flat would be a horrible mess after a week, but somehow I managed to be quite clean, buying a dishwasher and having a girlfriend was definitely a key there.

[McJuicy]

Originally Posted by Christo

i'm pretty sure i am the awful roomate that most people complain about. frankly, i think you lame-assed bitch-punk gimps are the most fucking boring people on earth. you wanna be totally lame? whatever, but quit trying to be the fucking Sheriff of the 5-Room Suite and get all offended when i drink beer every night. the best roomates i ever had was when i lived with a bunch of other "terrible roomates" who got fucked up every night and we would program video games together, take videos of us punching each other in the face, make DIY slip-n-slides out of broken whiskey bottles, play Grindcore shows in the living room, get drunk on jungle juice and watch Party House, etc
there was a used condom in SOMEBODY ELSE'S ROOM? and you're pissed about it? whatever man.

JUST FUCKING CLEAN YOU FUCK, LIKE I WANNA LOOK AT SHIT STREAKS IN THE TOILET AND PUBES IN THE SINK JUST FUCKING CLEAN

[Dungeon Snake]

Well what if I leave the communal areas clean, but my room's a mess? Plus, when you live a punk rock lifestyle, sometimes some punk rock shit happens. Sometimes, the living room is a mess on Sunday morning. on account of hard-ass partying the night before. don't mean I aint gonna clean it up, but punk shit happens and sometimes you have work the next day or gotta pick up your cousin from court the next day or you accidentally don't wake up til 4 pm for 3 days in a row. You gonna bust every ball in sight?

[Jimmah]

Originally Posted by Christo

Well what if I leave the communal areas clean, but my room's a mess? Plus, when you live a punk rock lifestyle, sometimes some punk rock shit happens. Sometimes, the living room is a mess on Sunday morning. on account of hard-ass partying the night before. don't mean I aint gonna clean it up, but punk shit happens and sometimes you have work the next day or gotta pick up your cousin from court the next day or you accidentally don't wake up til 4 pm for 3 days in a row. You gonna bust every ball in sight?

thats cool. this is the problem with living with people...

i work a steady job, with a set pattern. my old flat mate didnt. so i would be at work in the morning, i would try and have my nice cereal and coffee in the living room that stunk of cigarettes and weed, and had empty beer cans and clothes about the place.

but thats not an example of someone being a dick. thats just two people in different lifestyles but living together. its not practical.

[McJuicy]

Originally Posted by Christo

Well what if I leave the communal areas clean, but my room's a mess? Plus, when you live a punk rock lifestyle, sometimes some punk rock shit happens. Sometimes, the living room is a mess on Sunday morning. on account of hard-ass partying the night before. don't mean I aint gonna clean it up, but punk shit happens and sometimes you have work the next day or gotta pick up your cousin from court the next day or you accidentally don't wake up til 4 pm for 3 days in a row. You gonna bust every ball in sight?

Sunday becomes Monday becomes Tuesday becomes NEVER. Clean it up ASAP. After you pick your cousins up, come home and clean. It sucks you have to do that but you live with other people who dont want to look at stick Jager counter stains while they cook some chicken. You want to have sticky counters on your own go for it but Monday rolls around and my kitchen smells like farted in vinagar NO DEAL

[Dungeon Snake]

well... agree to disagree

[Dungeon Snake]

i mean i also think that, no matter what, every roomate is gonna do shit that annoys every other roomate. maybe i leave sick-ass jager stains on the counter, but maybe i think your throw-pillows are fucking hideous and your girlfriend has the most annoying laugh in the world. part of living with another person is learning to accept that they are going to annoy you some of the time, and that doesn't mean they are a shitty person

[Bobby Swisha]

[McJuicy]

maybe if youre living with friends but if youre with 5 strangers jesus christ class it up. Show you can be a human being IT AINT HARD. Like if you notice "HEY someone has cleaned the communal bathroom. Its so nice to shit in a clean bathroom hmmm so nice" and never help make a clean bathroom a reality for everyone by chipping in maybe once every third week instead of never. Just getting a fucking vacuum out and giving it a whirl instead of waiting until your roommate is passive aggressively jeering you about being a slob JUST TAKE THE FUCKING HINT YOU HOBO

[Lord Blazer]

^

[John Coffee]

Originally Posted by Christo

Well what if I leave the communal areas clean, but my room's a mess? Plus, when you live a punk rock lifestyle, sometimes some punk rock shit happens. Sometimes, the living room is a mess on Sunday morning. on account of hard-ass partying the night before. don't mean I aint gonna clean it up, but punk shit happens and sometimes you have work the next day or gotta pick up your cousin from court the next day or you accidentally don't wake up til 4 pm for 3 days in a row. You gonna bust every ball in sight?

i lived in punk rock houses for years. it's all good until you're trying to sober up and become a real person.

[Liam Brocklehurst]

I'm still laughing at

Originally Posted by McJuicy

kitchen smells like farted in vinagar

[Rabid Dinosaur]

I'm pretty sure my roommates didn't like me that much. A couple years ago I moved into an apartment with three guys I'd never met before, and I hit it off really well with one of them. He only lived there for one semester, but he was most certainly a "bad" roommate, and I enabled him. On random weeknights he'd bring home a 12-pack or two of Bud Light (and on some occasions a 30-rack of Keystone) or whatever and I'd sit in the kitchen with him and get wasted listening to music and talking until 4 or 5 in the morning. We'd usually leave the kitchen table covered in beer cans until the next day, but it was never too out of hand. Since we practically never used the common areas and it was a brand new apartment (we were literally the first people to live there), it was always pretty clean. Neither of the other guys ever complained about the talking and the music, but I feel a little guilty thinking back. After my friend left, none of the three of us ever talked to each other. I continued to live there for three more semesters and swore loudly at videogames, but otherwise did not have a presence in my roommates' lives.

[Andres]

when i first moved to madrid i rented a room from this paraguayan waitress who had like a 12 yr old kid. i didn't feel too confident about that living arrangement but a friend of the family had arranged it for me and i didn't want to spend weeks without a place to live and living in a hostel or something.

this woman was never really around the house, she worked all day. but she clearly was not equipped to handle living with someone else and was just completely OCD about cleaning.

she would yell loudly in the mornings about how 'dirty' everything was even though the apartment was always impeccable, she'd berate her son for leaving breadcrumbs on the counter, she couldn't deal with oil sprinkling anywhere (dude, it's a fucking kitchen), it was incredibly obnoxious. it got to the point where if, say, i cooked a meal for myself, then while i was eating it, she'd go to the kitchen and clean up whatever was dirty. its like dude, let me finish eating and i'll clean, what the fuck.

then also she started to clean my room. like, i'd go out at 1 the morning and when i got back at 4, my bed would have been made.

i lasted a little over a month.

[tronderboo]

What were you doing between 1am and 4am?

[Jimmah]

i assume out partying?

in barcelona at least, i have left the house many times at 11pm (being early) as late as 2am (being a bit late). the beach party, that happens every week, tends to begin at 11pm here and finish at 6am. and then after that there's 'after' parties that start from 6am-11am. it's fucking nuts.

andres, you really should tidy the kitchen as you eat. you insensitive prick.

[Andres]

yeah, sometimes i'd just get a random call from someone at 1-2 am saying "let's go clubbing".