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#1
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(this was part of a Film Festival review)
After that came Replay, a movie somewhat based on those Whodunnit movies. Personally, I haven't seen Whodunnit. But I did see this one. Everyone said this movie was a piece of shit. However, unlike the other movies which everyone said sucked ass, I decided to download this one. Why? Well, because Ramza was being such a fucking ass about the beating this movie was taking that I just HAD to see it. I guess the moral of the story is you shouldn't defend shit, or it'll attract more flies. Or something equally poetic. Replay starts off with an explosion. Followed by this, a detective goes to a crime scene, in which a guy was shot. Of course, the guy and the room are in perfect condition, even though there was an explosion. That is, if the explosion had anything to do with the movie and wasn't the animation for Ramza's production company. Ah ha, a clue! Maybe it's a produced bomb. Our detective then spouts off some random gibberish that I don't give a shit about. Some lame noir narration, I guess. Then there's a lame CSI meets Jeff Ching animation scene. And then there's the interrogation of the 2 main suspects, who are The Guy With The Funky Voice™ and The Black Twin Who Is The Killer™. Then some shit blows up, some whore wife gets shot, and there's a completely ridiculous chase scene. Then finally the game portion comes on. You have to select the options. Just in case you're feeling curious and want to download this movie, I'll spoil the endings so that you don't waste your fucking time: if you pick The Guy With The Funky Voice™, you get shot. If you pick The Black Twin Who Is The Killer™, well obviously you find out he's the killer. And there's another idiot ending involving cocks. In the last FF, I didn't watch the movies I uploaded, so I'm assuming that's what Leigh did here. Because I can't imagine how you could justify this crap being released to the public. Ever. This movie sucks. It sucks as a movie. It sucks as a game. It sucks as a movie/game. There's nothing this movie doesn't completely suck ass at. Some people said the music was good. Well guess what? Music doesn't work when the goddamn visuals that are accompanying it completely kill of any drama or suspense or emotion. Don't watch this, ever. Please. 0/5. |
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![]() ![]() Terrible
“I can't imagine how you could justify this crap being released to the public. Ever.”
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