Escape And Sacrifice

I've seen plenty of shit 3dmm movies, and I've been involved in a few. But where Killing Ramza Brave never appears to have intended to be good, and where Replay was an utterly half-assed failure, Tony Teulan's Magnum Opus appears to have been a genuine attempt to make a serious movie about the Holocaust, let down by a lack of animation and scriptwriting skill.

Well, that and the fact that the man was a fucking nutcase.

The problems are apparent from the beginning, when we see the first scene, a wobbly zoom on a lamp-post. I know 3DMMAP was still a while away, but this is beyond rediculous. It gets sillier when Yousef monologues about bringing only the bare essentials to the ghetto, then leaves the house carrying a treasure chest, and Valentine having enough time to wave at an approaching bullet before it hits him in the face

It never really gets better either. The fight on the bridge (WHICH I AM ABOUT TO GIF FOR YOU RIGHT NOW) truly has to be seen to be believed. It's the be-all-end-all of how bad "serious" 3dmming can get

3DMM ANIMATION PROTIP #1: Having all the characters fall over does not constitute a fight scene

As much as it's the most frequently discussed part of the movie, Jeff Ching's immortal line deserves special mention. IT IS EVERYTHING YOU HAVE HEARD IT TO BE, and trust me, in context, is equally as amazing as when it is quoted. The freaky thing is that due to a soundglitch, the line is spoken again by Jodie while sitting in the air-raid shelter. Jeff can't take all the quotability glory though. Mike Pfister's Herrmann ("DOES YOUR FATHER KNOW YOU'RE STAYYYYING WITH A BOOOOOYYYYY?!?) and Paul Marriot's Yousef (NOW'S THE TIME TO REMAIN AND SEE HOW GOOD A JOB OUR FRIENDLY CORRUPT NAZI OFFICIAL KLAUS DID ON THESE PAPERS I SHALL BROADCAST THIS FACT IN THE DIRECT VICINITY OF NAZI PAPER INSPECTORS!) both take their own fair share of bad lines. And of course, Tony himself makes the occasional appearance.

The story almost tries at points, but completely fails to extract any emotion from the viewer other than sheer hilarity (is hilarity even an emotion? Shit.)

There's really nothing to be said in Escape And Sacrifice's !!! defence. Even in 2000 it was far below the 3dmm standard, and it contributes nothing in terms of storytelling. This movie fails in almost every way a movie's able to fail.

[Fredrick]

That one scene made me want to check out the rest. That was probably not the intention, but it looks hilarious.

Cool review.

[Tuna Hematoma]

Hey, I also did a good job in this movie damn it.

[Andres]

this review sucks. write longer. this is barely a blurb.

[Fist]

I would like to see a live action reboot.

[Pankrial Steve]

Fist, WTF? This movie's 11 years old, and it sucks. Go watch Inglourious Basterds or something instead.

[Opheox]

Thanks, Steve