Killing Ramza Brave

Oh man where to start. Before we start I would like to introduce something called SHS or Shitty Humor (or Humour for all you stubborn bastards that feel an extra vowel really adds to the word) Syndrome. This movie suffers heavily from SHS with countless lame attempts at humor. Most include a badly made penis of some sort. I dunno about you but my dick doesn't look like a perfect cylinder. Other stupid shit includes an annoying "random typing". Stuff like 'omg lokerw at the citeee its soooooc00ldsa" which means nothing more than Bown and Doughboy telling us "we're not trying to say Ramza types bad or anything we're just using stupid sarcasm to try and get people to laugh". Sorry guys but it wasn't funny the first time and by the 17th it just got downright retarded (not unlike the directors themselves). Well lets start from the beginning and progress through the movie shall we?

The movie starts off showing a preview of some Ramza spoof movie that takes place in some place called Motgomery, Alabama. I mean guys if you're trying to make fun of someone at least spell it RIGHT you cockless fucks. After seeing that it is Ramza's new movie we get a glimpse at the smallest fucking desktop known to man and then a shot of our two heroes who then seem to somehow get so enraged over a three second trailer they decide to assassinate Ramza. And at this time while the viewer is still trying to figure out what the hell Bown is saying the company intro randomly kicks in, making you forget all about the previous blabber.

If you've managed to survive thusfar without smashing your monitor screen in then you'll have the pleasure of listening to the opening credits which happens to include the worst song off of Hybrid Theory. Our prepubescent heroes then travel down into Bown's basement where apparently giant leaky pipes are naturally just sticking out of the wall. They then arm themselves with green spheres with T's sticking out the top and the ever so trusty '''i` and head off to the 3DMM BB. Bown and Doughboy seem to think we've forgot about what this whole movie is about because in the next scene they show us stick figure drawings of what they plan to do, though if anyone hasnt guessed by the title and the directors it is evident now that Ramza will die. THANKS FOR RUINING THE MOVIE YOU FUCKHEADS!

Reloading the guns was another hilarious scene because apparently on these guns the entire handle needs to fall off in order to properly load another clip. How genius! Especially when the first clip is alot bigger than the replacement. Our heroes then drive out of Bown's house, which is apparently built right next to the road cause their are yellow dotted lines leading into the garage. Same thing goes for the road. I mean Christ at least take the time to make the roads look normal, the dotted yellow lines are more like giant yellow squares, which Bown completely ignores as he barrels down the middle of the road like a bat out of hell to the BB, hitting some guy along on the way. Hell I don't really blame the guy anyways as he prolly confused the yellow squares to be a crossing walk, cause I sure as hell would've.

The next scene might make people think "wow that looks damn good". Well that's cause they took it from Jorrit. No suprise there though since they admitted it themselves but just in case you didn't know. Next they enter the BB and are confronted by two robot guards that take their IDs. I'll admit this was a kinda cool idea but that doesn't really help much. They then hide behind some wierd metal thing that would conceal them if it wasn't for the fact that it was only one and a half foot high. Oh well the BB must be full of blind people.

Then we are shown Ramza's new movie in a lame attempt at parodying his mysterious typoing habit that only Bown and Doughboy can see. After this unfunny movie Ramza is shown as some gay guy going through puberty or some shit with the typical pink Nsync poster and purple computer in case we don't get by the sound of his voice that he's being portrayed as gay. I mean I'm sure that ALL people that are gay have everything purple just to emphasize the fact that they in fact are gay. Congratulations Bown you fucking moron.

We then follow Ramza on his way to the BB. There is a Stop sign in the middle of the walkway(??) and then Ramza falls. Are we supposed to laugh, I thought but then I thought not too since if you have to think if it's funny or not it's probably not. After he reaches the BB he goes through the entrance and then into and elevator where I have no idea what the fuck was going on. The we enter a room with a dog with what looks like a huge tumor and an apparent knock at Royston on the wall. Ya know guys that whole Tupac thing was over, I dunno, THREE MONTHS AGO. Then we travel passed some badly made HMC and onto a whole scene that includes a newbie getting shot up. Ok that's kinda true with the BB but it didn't make me laugh. Another victim of SHS.

After Ramza screens his movie Bown and Doughboy pop in to show him whose boss. Immediately everyone ducks cause ya know the first thing that pops into my mind when Bown and Doughboy enter the room is "oh shit I gotta hide!". Anyways Ramza gets chased out of the room and steals Bown's car (oh no!) but never fear! Bown and Doughboy manage to find some...thing made out of flipped letters in the back, which happens to be perfectly highway approved despite the fact that it has absolutely no windows. But what it doesn't have in windows it makes up for in steering wheels! Even later on it looks as if the manufactorers decided to not even attach the steering wheel to the column right.

Ok as you can see I'm getting bored so I'll try and wrap this up. Ramza's car then spontaneously combusts into what looks like a pile of blood or something I couldn't really tell cause the animation was too shitty. Well Ramza hops out and summons his Newbie Army to go attack Bown and Doughboy who for some reason aren't considered newbies themselves now. But never fear! Our heroes whip out the big guns and start blasting the newbies to hell, the same thing they criticized the BB of doing earlier in the movie. Funny isn't it? It is also this moment in time that Bown's gun seems apparently strong enough to launch him fifty feet in the air by only shooting at the ground. The animation is so awkward in this scene as well because newbies seem to just run aimlessly around and fall over (shot?) and spill more blood than I thought possible in one person.

Then poor Ramza meets his doom anticlimatically as a giant safe falls on him. What a wasted death. At least make a cool ending to compensate for the shittiest of the rest of this movie. Argh! Anyways our heroes make a Replay joke (cause we all know how funny that is now right guys?! lololol!111!!) and hop into a car that apparently was made for Andre the Giant casue the interior is fucking HUGE! What's cool about it too is that it has a steering wheel but you seem to not have to actually use it in order to control the car.

Anyways that concludes my review/spoiler thing. If you actually made it through I hope you enjoyed reading it or something cause I didn't enjoy making it. It's fun what you do when you're bored.

3/10