My latest short film - iDate

[The Chinese Jew]

Hey everyone. Sup?!

So, here's my latest short film. I'd like to classify it as a satirical, hopefully unpretentious, batshit crazy, but sweet romantic comedy iDate. It's about 19 minutes, it cost me fuckloads of money...and youthfulness. I took a big gamble by casting almost entirely non-actors, aaaaand don't watch this at work or around kids. There's lots of swearing, and lots of offensive, un-PC things that are said. Ya know, a Jeff Ching movie. My humor hasn't really changed all that much...well minus the use of peach cylinders.

Thank you to Boris Ran for doing the Ching of Comedy animated intro at the beginning and thanks to Mr. Dylan Breed for letting me use Drivemouth music. I know that he hates the song that I went with, but I think it fit the scene perfectly.

Alright, not much more to say. Please watch and let me know what you think.

[Broken Pencil]

I thought the beginning parts with the couple and the iPhone, along with the contract were hilarious. Everything onward wasn't as funny though. Although I thought the part with Simon made me laugh quite a bit.

[OmniromX]

Very nice. I lold at the guy playing bejwewled while peeing, and the asian guy using like 4 ipads at the table . I like the ending. It was sweet. The one thing that stood out as kinda amateur is the guy leaving as soon as he hears bbc is coming. It seemed like lazy writing, because I thought to myself, "hey, they seemed to be hitting it off by then, i would've suggested to go to a different venue instead of just leaving if I were him ". Or, IRL the girl would've suggested a different venue because she said she thought he was nice, un creepy. Also, some of the skits at the beginning like the frat one could've been cut out just because they are repetitive. But i liked the style of the beginning, it got me hooked. Overall nice work though.

Also! One thing I felt was really tasteless was the down syndrome joke.

Also, maybe it'd be fun to experiment next time with instead of telling the audience the dude hates his life, show us and don't tell us. That's more convincing I feel.

[The Chinese Jew]

Thanks guys! Much appreciated. I'll respond more in depth later.

[The Chinese Jew]

Originally Posted by Broken Pencil

I thought the beginning parts with the couple and the iPhone, along with the contract were hilarious. Everything onward wasn't as funny though. Although I thought the part with Simon made me laugh quite a bit.

Yeah that was the concern about the script for a very long time. That the stuff with the main couple just wasn't as funny as the beginning 5 minutes with the side characters. I'd like to think that what you saw was the funniest material between the two, because holy shit was the script between the main couple re-written and re-written and re-written, to the point that I just didn't know what was funny anymore.

=OmniromX:
Very nice. I lold at the guy playing bejwewled while peeing, and the asian guy using like 4 ipads at the table .

That was my older brother who did the peeing scene. He'd be very happy to know that you loved his stuff.

I like the ending. It was sweet. The one thing that stood out as kinda amateur is the guy leaving as soon as he hears bbc is coming. It seemed like lazy writing, because I thought to myself, "hey, they seemed to be hitting it off by then, i would've suggested to go to a different venue instead of just leaving if I were him ".

Nice! So were you feeling the chemistry between the couple? That was one thing that I was never too sure I hit, was the chemistry between the two and the audience rooting for them to be together at the end.

Fair enough about the lazy writing.

I got some people commenting that the movie should have been a shorter comedy, but I really adamantly wanted to make a 3 act structured romantic comedy that hit all the formulaic plot points including the separation of the couple, and the tease of them not being together.

[spoiler]
But yes, in hindsight Ramone did seem to give up a little too easily. When going through the footage, I wish I at least had a shot of Ramone looking back at her before leaving, to at least show that his character had second thoughts, and maybe a little sadness on his part that he's giving up on this. His leaving so abruptly and quickly is something that irks me a little when I re-watch it.

I really wanted Crystal's speech to hammer home the point that she likes Ramone, and sees that if he stays with her, his life could get really fucked up, so she cuts it off with him to save him. But yeah, not sure that came through enough in her speech.

Also, some of the skits at the beginning like the frat one could've been cut out just because they are repetitive. But i liked the style of the beginning, it got me hooked.

This I'll just have to agree to disagree. The frat part was my favorite part of the opening and it got an applause at the screening.

Also, maybe it'd be fun to experiment next time with instead of telling the audience the dude hates his life, show us and don't tell us. That's more convincing I feel.

But, just telling is sooo much easier!! But, fair point. It is lazy writing to just have characters say their emotions rather than to show.

I thank you for your comments. You give constructive honest comments to everything I do, and I really appreciate that.

[Broken Pencil]

I just rewatched the part where she throws her phone at Simon. I don't know why, but I found it hilarious when there was a sudden music stop.

[The Chinese Jew]

I think the sound effect of the phone hitting his head definitely helped. In the original cut, we used some zoom sound effect and that part wasn't funny.

But when we found a more exaggerated, brutal sound effect, we were laughing our asses off in the editing room, so I think that helped.

[Mabdog]

what camera are you using?

[The Chinese Jew]

A Lumix GH4, and it was shot in 4k.