00 Dee Boned: Venison Jelly
By Russel Stepan



What can I say? That was pure brilliance in every possible way. I never really expected much out of the sixth in the Dee Boned series, but this really did overwhelm me to the point of jaw-droppingness, which believe me is hard to do.

Everything that was animated in this movie was animated with precise timing and executed with some fiiiiiiiine skill indeed. I had to watch this movie twice, in two parts: One to hear the story and figure out what's going on, the other to gawk endlessly at my computer screen until my eyes begin to ache (Not specifically in that order). From the chase scene to the... other chase scene to........ another chase scene? Chase after chase after chase after... witty conversation. I'd have thought Id've got bored of all the chasing by the middle of the movie, but this stuff was to amazing to possibly get bored of. The gunfight scene? Brilliant. Log flume scene? WHOLLY AWESOMES. And best of all, it was all FUNNY, an area of which most PAMs fail in.
I'll admit the storyline isn't pretty incredible, although it's a lot better than the past Dee Bonedses, with our hero being FRAMED (Gasp) for stealing the chief's venison jelly sandwich. Comedic action ensues throughout. But the thing with the story is that by the time you've finished you think that the story WAS good. But then when you actually think about what happens, you come back down to earth with a bump that could break your legs and pelvis. But it's good to know that this movie has made a breakthrough in pointless action movies by making the viewer forget that there's a storyline at all. Not make them forget there ISN'T one, but make them forget that the one that there IS is so dumb. It's tough to explain, but it sure fills up this review, huh?
The voices were good. Russel was brilliant and Jaymond was the same as he always is: Great. The humor was as sharp as a razored razormane, with the kind of slapstick comedy I'd expect out of Dominator Dan. All the 'stupid' laughs that you get around here work really well with the movie as a whole, so that's definitely a good point. Anyway, back to business:

TECHNICAL REVIEW:

GRAPHICS: 14/15
SOUND + MUSIC: 4/5
VOICES: 4/5
STORYLINE: 13/30
ANIMATION: 20/20
VA VA VOOM: 46/50

OVERALL: 101/120

PERSONAL SCORE: * * * * * * * * * 9/10

"Watch out Dominator Dan, you've got some stiff competition."

Pamela d00d

Slightly Confused

i....Ice Cream Man?

Didn't I already do that in my last review thread?

UTD and Hangman please

Pamela
By Aaron Haynes



On the penultimate day of the 2004 film festival, Aaron releases almost straight out of the blue another of his countless visual masterpieces, and a great movie on the side, too.

This movie introduces one of the most lovable characters in the 3dmm history-thing, Detective Detective Joe Peterson, who is without a doubt a great and, well, fun-to-laugh-at kind of guy. And he's caught up in a web of CRIME AND CORRUPTION IN THE LAND OF THE... LIVING(?).... okay, maybe not. The real story is that Detective Detective (;)) Joe Peterson is finding out that all of his clients aren't staying alive long enough to pay him, and that they're all being killed without reason or warning by a woman named Pamela. And so the story begins...
Like everything Aaron makes, Pamela features stunning scenery and animation, with a perfect soundtrack that fits the movie like a pair of oiled-up black socks. Of course I recognised most of them (Mainly the Don Copal theme and Mr Frustration music from Grim Fandango) down to a letter (Post mp3 of Keep 'Em Seperated plz?). Soooo... yeah.
Now to what I believe is the most important part of any film, the Va-Va-Voom. The Mojo. What the french call a certain... I don't know what. And this movie has VVV coming up to its ears. With the jokes, the laughs and not a single mishap in movie co-ordination (Bear with me here), I have to say that this is a fantastic movie. And how quickly did he make it? A few months, maybe? Geez.
The voice acting throughout the movie was marvellous (Even though there were only 2 and a half voice actors), all of them. Jon Barton did a splenderifikkus job as Peterson, better than I had anticipated or thought he could do for the role (Considering he had to talk in a slight american accent). Max did a good job with his one-liner, and Burgon also succeeded in his extremely deep and moving roles........... .....

Aaaaagh, I'm so tired right now so if this review sucks please tell me :(

TECHNICAL REVIEW:

GRAPHICS: 15/15
SOUND + MUSIC: 5/5
VOICES: 4/5
STORYLINE: 19/30
ANIMATION: 20/20
VA VA VOOM: 46/50

OVERALL: 109/135

PERSONAL SCORE: * * * * * * * * * 9/10

"Stunning, beautiful and a definite watch."

Just under three weeks, believe it or not. The script consisted of nothing but Detective's monologue, and the film itself was crafted around that. 3dmmap made the whole thing go incredibly smoothly, though I still had to invent a lot of shadow and lighting effects on the spot to give the film its own visual look.

Thanks for the review, man. :) And yeah I'll get that mp3 up when I can get Orcus to upload for me, as my upstream here at college is terrible.

OH. MY. GOD!

Ice Cream Man
By Kyle Magocs



Ice Cream Man is... well, a music video. Nothing to spiffy or amazing story-centric wise, but it's a fun little watch about a kid chasing an ice cream truck for some... vague reason... I dunno, just read this and shut up.

Now, I've never seen any of Kyle Magocs' other stuff (NOTE: I watched this movie before I saw his compilation) so I don't know what to expect from him, but the basic scenery and sometimes sorta under-average animation left me in dark from what I was supposed to be watching. Okay, so there's no story, bad scenery and animation, so what am I to expect from a movie like this? The answer is 2-and-a-bit minutes of good fun, that's what. It's always fun to watch chases in 3dmm, no matter how they look or what they're about. So I was pretty pleased while watching that young lad breeze down the highway after the one-eyed ice cream man before tansforming into a bouncy HMC and ending the movie with a cliff drop. Um... there's not much else to say, really.

TECHNICAL REVIEW:

GRAPHICS: 6/15
SOUND + MUSIC: 5/5
NO VOICES
NO STORY
ANIMATION: 11/20
VA VA VOOM: 30/50

OVERALL: 52/85

PERSONAL SCORE: * * * * * * 6/10

"Good for short viewing, but nothing spectacular."

Unleash the Dragon
By Frogman



Having started off in the community fairly recently, I haven't experienced the hype that was chuggered up by this film, but from what I've seen today I can definitely say it deserved it all. I'll review each section seperately:

The Boat
What can I say except for 'Very James Bond'. Frogman has definitely captured the essence he was trying to achieve in making a 3dmm version of a 007 movie, which usually turn out very disappointingly indeed. The animation and construction, overall, was astounding. The shimmy action, the guns, the camoflage HMC were just a few samples of the good stuff Frogman has managed to whip up on this little program. And then, moments after the pretty cool fight scene, comes the widely popular and very famous 'boat jump' slow-mo scene. Astounding. Hmm... but wasn't the blood a little much for a James Bond movie?

Casino Confrontation
As soon as Mr Bond steps out of the lift you know what's gonna happen... and boy does it happen. You know and I know that everybody loves to see small asians having the shit kicked out of them by a bearded man wearing karate pants, so it was pretty obvious no one could be disappointed here. I know I certainly wasn't. Some coolio fight animation here, definitely a charmer for a movie such as this.

ATV Chase
W...wow. Fucking wow. Definitely some of the best vehicles I've ever seen in a 3dmm movie, including the train. And the clincher is they seem pretty basic when you actually take them apart and have a look at them that you feel really annoyed for some reason. Then there's the helicopter and another memorable scene involving a british secret agent, an enemy airborne assault machine and a very large explosive device. Anyway, all this is definitely used to good effect here, albeit some areas are obviously unfinished.

The Infiltration
Definitely some XIII flashbacks here (Altough this was made long before XIII was out, right?) with the whole snow base and everything. The snow effect was pretty awesome, as was the sniper rifle view. After that it leaves you with a rather empty feeling of unfinishededness as it goes on to the voiceless conversation scene.

I don't technically review unfinished movies.

PERSONAL SCORE: * * * * * * * * 8/10

"Definitely would've been worth the hype if finished. A very sad loss."

Hangman
By Frogman



Now, when I watched Hangman for the first time I loved it. It was smoothly done, surprising and although the scenery and animation was a little basic, it was all made up for by its original plotline and strong atmosphere.

Then, I went out and bought a game called Twisted Metal: Black.

And I was like, what the fuck? If you ever play TMB and watch the cinematics you'll see the massive link between it and Hangman. Sunder (Obviously Frogman's version of Calypso), the dialogue, even Paint It Black at the end, TMB's theme tune. Now usually I'm not too picky about relations between two things, but I felt more like this was a TMB fan movie than an original flick, and considering I felt it so original at the beginning I felt slightly cheated at what came before my eyes. However, the music that accompanied the movie was spudgin' awesome, the voices were also pretty good. Basically, this could've been better if it hadn't been already done by someone else.

If you want proof, watch Hangman then download Agent Stone's opening and closing cinematics at www.tmalliance.com

TECHNICAL REVIEW:

GRAPHICS: 4/15
SOUND + MUSIC: 5/5
VOICES: 5/5
STORYLINE: 0/30
ANIMATION: 5/20
VA VA VOOM: 20/50

OVERALL: 39/135

PERSONAL SCORE: * * 2/10

"A good movie, but it's lack of originality whatsoever kills it all. An awful shame."

But how was it beFORE you learned it was ripped? That's worth mentioning, because if that ruinned the movie for you then there's nothing in your review for someone who hasn't bothered with Twisted Metal: Black.

Hmm, a good point. I thought about it a bit too, but then I thought what could I say about it that's any different if the storyline is unoriginal and he didn't make it up himself, the storyline being the only thing that made me like it at the start.

I wish I could give it a better mark, but I really can't.

liquid sunshine please

SATANIK.

I like the fact that you put pictures at the top of your reviews....

I've never seen anyone do that on a review thread here.....

Moderately Confused :)

ahem

"Shit Happens" please.

molotov cocktails = awesome

Already reviewed, check my last review thread.

And I'll do the rest ASAP. Thanks for the bump.

Liquid Sunshine
By Jon Barton



When I downloaded this movie, I wasn't really sure what I was going to be in for, considering this came from the guy who made Y&SWHN, a film about a bird that goes psycho-insane. Was this going to be a drama? A comedy? Well... at the end, it turned out to be a bit of both.

The joes in this movie are 'crude' to say the least, including jokes about roadkill, vomit and people getting crushed by trees, but hey. This is the 21st Century. Our generation laughs at the misfortune of others. So to say the least there were plenty of laughs round about here. There were plenty of tears, too, and they weren't from the laughter of the 'veggie burger' joke. The monologue of the tube-headed man would've been considered 'moving' by others, but this is a review by ME, and I personally fail to cry about the tragic problems of a bald man with a cylinder for a head, but hey. Different strokes for different folks or something like that. Barton did a very good attempt at voicing the lead character, keeping in his usual optimistic british accent that we've all come to know and love. And the graphics! Oooohhh, yes. We've got some fantastical scenery here (Plus extra 'weather' by Mr Helping Hand Haynes), and some brilliant HMC animation that's smooth, stylish and... uh... s'funny. Jon's character design of tube-heads makes a wonderful addition to his supply of 'good stuff'. Now on to the storyline, and at first it was a little hard to understand. Now I've seen it about twelve times... and it's still a little hard to understand. I won't go into spoilers but rest assured it'll have you thinking by the time the volume goes on down.

TECHNICAL REVIEW:

GRAPHICS: 15/15
SOUND + MUSIC: 4/5
VOICES: 4/5
STORYLINE: 26/30
ANIMATION: 18/20
VA VA VOOM: 34/50

OVERALL: 101/135

PERSONAL SCORE: * * * * * * * * 8/10

"Quality reels from the imaginative Joe Burton!"

Well, in this particular case, the movie took special care to point out that since he's awoken from a coma years after going into the hospital, he finds that a child version of himself got to pick and choose what it is he has memories of. This is the whole point of his monologue, that he has the memory of an 11-year-old boy, with the kinds of things an 11-year-old boy would remember best: crude things like roadkill, vomit, and moments of humiliation and embarrassment.

Good review. I like "Helping Hand Haynes", I'm gonna remember that.

* Finds your review *

* Hugs you very hard *