3dmm.com - Jackson

THE MOVIE:
The tagline for the movie was: "Love, Deceit, Fast Food."

.. or something to the effect.

The movie started off with the mafia boss and his monologue about the attacks on his businesses, and that he was afraid that they were going to attack his daughter next.
Then it followed his daughter as she goes shopping and her bodyguards are over-paranoyed and they pull her out of the store, basically to illustrate that she can't do shit under her father's restrictions.
Then, all of a sudden, two men walk up to the car and kill off the driver. They leave the other bodyguard alive so that he can be a witness and a messenger. They take the daughter's purse, force her into the the back of their car and tell the remaining bodyguard that if the mafia boss wants to see his daughter alive again, he needs to deliver $15,000,000 to the parking lot of Smiley McSmile's Hamburgers. A small privately-owned fast food restaurant out in the middle of the desert. Then they drive off.

Cue opening credits. If I remember correctly they were to (Oh, punk rock fester, how we miss you.)

After opening credits, we were dropped in a small suburban house where the kidnappers were discussing something kind of dumb and mundane. The two kidnappers were very spastic and crazy. One of them was a little bit cooler, the other one was a Mormon who refused to ever use the F word. (but yes, had no problem taking people's lives.)
One of them gets up after the conversation is over and peaks into a small room where the daughter is sound asleep. One of them gets a phone call on his cel (not the mormon, the other.). It's his wife. She needs him for one reason or another and he runs out of the house.

He shows up at their home- another Suburban house where his wife needs money for one reason or another. She's really high-strung and emotional. The kidnapper runs out to his car, rummages through the daughter's purse that he still has and grabs the twenty dollar bill out of it. He runs back in and gives it to his wife.

After they have a conversation showing how much their relationship is in shambles, the kidnapper leaves, leaving us alone with his wife. She watches day-time TV for a second and then there's a knock at the front door. She goes and answers it, and it's a guy with an afro puff. He goes, "Is he gone? I was beginning to actually get JEALOUS." then it cut to 'FIVE MINUTES LATER' where they were fucking on her bed.

We learn that this is her boyfriend. A TV repair man who has an ego the size of... I don't know... TEXAS. (the action joe character. with the pink hawaiian shirt and a big yellow ball for his afro.)

After they lye in bed for a while they have a discussion about the husband and that he should be killed. The TV repair man submits the idea to kill him himself. The wife approves and he decides that he will do it that night.

Then he asks her for money so he can go grab a burger from McSmiley's. The wife gives him the twenty and he heads out to McSmiley's.

When he arrives at McSmiley's, we're introduced to the guy who runs the restaurant all by himself. (seeing that it's in the desert. and gets no customers what so ever) He stands behind the counter and he's completely distant. The TV Repair man gives the man the twenty to pay for his meal. Then he begins to narrate.

The McSmiley employee is fucking crazy, he's a skitzophrenic who has alternate fantasies about grabbing the TV repair man and taking him to the back of the restaurant and sticking his face in the frying water. But doesn't.

After the TV repair man leaves we're left alone with the McSmiley's employee. He sits around and has dark thoughts as he wastes the day alone in his establishment.

Then two black men walk into the restaurant. One is a tiny fellar and the other is a big gargantuan (sp?) of a man. (The one with the sideways hat and the boxer.) They have almost a Jay & Silent Bob dynamic. The big one speaks monosyllabically in a deep voice. While the other one has a high pitched voice and has little-man syndrome.

The little one pulls a gun out and they hold up the mcsmiley's. They take all the money out of the register and leave.

We're now with these two black men who recieve a call from the Mafia boss. They drive over to the mafia boss's mansion and have a meeting with him in the office we started off in. He says that he has a million dollars for them if they come out with him to McSmiley's tonight to the trade off. They obviously complain that they just came from there but then they realize that there's a million dollars at stake so they comply.

This ends our following of the twenty dollar bill. we cut to title card: "THE EXCHANGE"

Now we have a bird's eye view of everybody gathering at McSmiley's. There was obviously going to be a lot of build up to the actual exchange but i'll save you some reading:

- The kidnappers drive to McSmiley's with the daughter in the trunk.
- The TV Repair man and the kidnapper's wife tail the kidnappers as they drive to McSmiley's because the TV repair man is going to take out the kidnapper.
- The two black men drive with the mafia boss to McSmiley's with $15,000,000 in THEIR trunk.
- The McSmiley's employee is in McSmiley's, sticking his hand on the fryer. Pleasure pain.

The kidnappers arrive first. they park in the parking lot. The TV repair man and the wife park in the distance, get out of the car and start to cautiously walk up to McSmiley's. When they get there they hide behind one of the walls and wait.

Then the two black men and the mafia boss arrive in the limo. They park across from the kidnappers' car and they have a small verbal exchange to start off the Trade-off.

Meanwhile, Behind the McSmiley's, the wife is telling the TV Repair man to get a move on it and head out there and kill him. Not realizing what is going on, he gets up and starts heading to where the trade off is being held.

They see him approaching and everyone begins panicking wanting to know who the fuck he is. Finally the small black man grabs an assault rifle out of the car and unloads into the TV repair man. The wife screams from the corner and the kidnapper says, "WHAT THE FUCK? THATS MY WIFE." so he runs over to the McSmiley's where she hides and the mafia boss is like, "WAIT WHERE THE FUCK IS HE GOING?" everyone panics and everyone begins opening fire.

The McSmiley's employee sees this going on outside and runs to the basement of his restaurant where he has an aresnal of weapons stashed. He grabs an M60 and runs back upstairs. He joins the fray and everyone is once again confused and starts firing back at him.

Now, the gunfight scene wasn't like: * BANG * * BANG BANG * * BANG * * BANG BANG BANG *

* OVER. *

I was going to do it like the Way of the Gun and have it be almost like a chess game where each character would take cover and have to strategize and find better places to fire from and what have you.

I could sit here and dissect the gunfight scene and tell you how it all happens but again, i'll save you the reading:

Everyone is killed, except for the wife who runs off, and the Mormon kidnapper.

So the kidnapper runs over to the trunk of the car and opens it up. The daughter gets up and walks out and says, "Did you kill him?" he goes, "I think so." she leans over her dead father and says, "Yeah. He's done." So the mormon kidnapper runs to the bag of money and starts rummaging through it. Saying joyous things like, "Theres enough money here to buy one of them private islands like Will Smith." or whatever.

The daughter picks up a gun from one of the dead bodies and blasts the kidnapper in the back of the head. Then grabs the bag of money, gets in a car and drives off.

Cue end credits to: